Sleepless

A good night's sleep has become elusive. I'm up every couple of hours, lately with breast pain. There's nothing quite like waking up to the sound of your own moans. Even with my pain tolerance it's difficult to deal with, so I'm taking a couple of Tylenol most nights.

I'm starting to feel a bit anxious about breastfeeding -- and hoping the pain doesn't get much worse. I've had one hysterical-crying jag over terrible nipple pain and it really freaked M out. Poor dear. Even when I was in horrible pain from the infection and septicemia and the 8inch incision that had to close without stitches, I didn't express as much pain. Could be that septic experience "broke" my pain threshold, or could be that I'm just in that much pain. It's subjective, so what matters is -- it hurts!

The baby is getting bigger and he's a wiggle-worm.  Last night M finally got to feel him moving around. Most of the time when M touches my belly the baby stops moving, but not this time. Maybe it's getting crowded in there?

Bigger baby means more internal pressure, which means I wake up more often with a need to shift positions. Which isn't easy anymore. Rolling over involves abdominal muscles that I just don't have the usual control over, so once I've rolled onto my back I feel like a turtle on it's back, trying to turn over. I'm considering trying rolling onto my belly/hands-and-knees and then laying on my other side from that position. Or maybe getting out of bed and then laying back down on the desired side. The nice thing about having a bed to myself is I can do that without disturbing anyone.

Being low on sleep makes me a bit cranky, and more than a little scattered. Combine that with all the hormonal pregnancy-brain stuff and I'm hardly recognizing myself these days. I can't seem to stay on top of commitments and appointments and whatnot. I've even called-off M's birthday party this weekend because I'm so tired that the thought of entertaining a large group of people for a few hours makes me want to cry.

But aside from the sleep deficit (which I'm sure I'll be getting used to once the baby comes) and the tender breasts, I'm feeling good. I'm learning to respect the limits of my body, so no more of those charlie-horse type cramps from over-exerting. I think that all the dietary supplements I'm taking are really helping support my health -- I haven't been sick in ages. Even the knee pain I experienced earlier in the pregnancy is gone, thankfully.

Eight more weeks. I can do eight more weeks of this. I think ;)